More Than Romance: Allie Samberts on Burnout, Friendship & Not a Strong Enough Word

This week on Lit with Lara Ashley, I’m joined by author Allie Samberts to discuss her novel Not a Strong Enough Word: a story that goes far beyond romance.

Together, we discuss burnout, creativity, publishing pressure, women’s friendship, emotional healing, and what it means to return to yourself after life quietly breaks you apart.

We also dive into:

• Scarlett’s emotional journey throughout the novel
• The realities of writing and publishing
• Why Trina’s friendship is one of the book’s strongest relationships
• Ryan is the ultimate “book boyfriend.”
• Mental health, ambition, and rebuilding after burnout
• The paperback release is coming this June

As someone who doesn’t typically gravitate toward romance-heavy books, I was surprised by how deeply this story resonated with me — especially its conversations around identity, exhaustion, and starting over.

If you love emotionally layered stories about creativity, healing, friendship, and second chances, this episode is for you.

Grab your favorite drink, settle in, and join the conversation.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:01

Hi everyone, and welcome back to Lit with Laura Ashley. Today I'm joined by author Ali Samberts to discuss her novel Not a Strong Enough Word, which I absolutely devoured. What I love most about this book is that while it's rooted in romance, it's really about burnout, creativity, friendship, identity, and returning to yourself after life kind of breaks you a little. Scarlett's story felt incredibly relatable, especially in a world where so many people are trying to hold themselves together while still producing and performing. So first, Ali, thank you so much for joining me today. So what first inspired Scarlett's story and the emotional journey she goes through in the novel?

SPEAKER_00 0:50

Yeah, so um this book kind of like it kind of came out of nowhere for me. Um some of my books I like plan a lot again. Um this one I didn't. I just was kind of like, you know what would be fun would be to write a second chance romance. I love second chance romance, right? It's my it's maybe my favorite troll. Maybe. Um it's hard to pick a favorite, but I think that might be that's up there. Um and so I wanted to write a second chance romance, and I thought it would be, I really like writing about like bookish characters, um, like authors, readers. My debut was an English teacher, you know, like like I just I just like people who like books. Um, and so I was like, you know, I think I want to write about this famous author, and I think wouldn't it be funny if that was not funny, but it would be cool if it was her editor that she was in love with and um had left for some reason. And so it it really started with that trope that I wanted to write, and it sort of turned into this, like kind of a kind of against my will. Um I just work here. The characters decide what they want, but it it sort of turned into this um kind of commentary on on burnout and depression. And I think because at the time that I wrote it, I was I'm also an English teacher, so I was feeling um kind of burnt out uh in my own life, right? Like there's this constant like pressure to do more and do well, and um especially with writing, you know, on top of all of that, um, and parenting, and you know, right? So there's just like more and more and more and more. And so I was kind of drawn to that part of the story for Scarlet because I thought that um being able to kind of voice that might be might resonate with a lot of people. It certainly did for me. So that's kind of where the story came from.

SPEAKER_01 3:01

I think it resonated with me as well because I think it's so relatable, just burnout and depression and stuff, which is you know, raise your hand if you ever felt like that. But I think that was a good way to kind of segue into what we're going through right now into society.

SPEAKER_00 3:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 3:19

So stepping away from the publishing world, I mean, it felt it felt huge that she was able to do it, and as someone who has stepped away from her full-time job, what conversations or experiences influenced the way you approach that part of the story?

SPEAKER_00 3:40

Well, at the time, you know, I haven't I haven't stepped away from my day job, but at the time, um, you know, we all kind of dream about like the grass being greener somewhere else, right? Right. Um, and I think like I am really fortunate as a teacher, like I don't have a corporate job, you know, so I think like it's a little easier to step away from like a a corporate, like I love my job, I love my students, I love, I love what I do, I love writing, I love all of it. Um but I think that there was a moment there where I had kind of like lost that a little bit, right? And I think Scarlett definitely feels that too. And obviously she's not a teacher, but I think the feelings, like you said, the feelings are relatable, like they're sort of the same. And I kept seeing a lot of my friends um kind of going through this point in their lives. Like, you know, I'm almost 42, like I'm midlife. Um, I've seen a lot of my friends like have these midlife crises too, where they're just like blowing up their whole lives and they're like, I'm done, you know? And I think some of that is probably age, some of that is probably like the current political climate. Um, that we're all just kind of feeling it, right? Like we're all like, this is there has to be something better. Um, and for Scarlet, you know, of course she had this like seven-figure publishing deal. I don't know if I'd be able to walk away from a seven-figure publishing deal.

SPEAKER_01 5:02

Right. Same.

SPEAKER_00 5:04

Right. Seven-figure anything. I think I might, I might just suck it up. But um, but for her, you know, and I think that this was maybe the most poignant part of the story for me. Like it wasn't about the money. Um, and it wasn't about the fame and the fortune and you know, all that stuff. It was about that she wanted more out of her personal life that she kind of realized that she wasn't able to have, right? She had to make a choice. It was either have this softer, quieter, um, just just like a like yeah, yeah, like a softer life, right? With Ryan. Or she could be with Ryan, but she would have to continue to like push harder and harder and harder and be gone all the time and um, you know, do these book clubs and interviews and be on. I think that's part of it too, right? Like that she had to be on all the time. And of course, as writers, like a lot of us are really introverted. I think readers too, right?

SPEAKER_01 6:03

Like a thousand percent.

unknown 6:05

We don't want to talk to people.

SPEAKER_00 6:06

And like even as a teacher, I'm I'm like an introverted, like an like an introverted extrovert, you know. Like I can I can turn it on when I need to, but when I come home at the end of the day, I'm like, I don't have any more words.

SPEAKER_01 6:16

Shut down, yeah, completely.

SPEAKER_00 6:18

Yeah, and I think that's Scarlet too. Like, it's not that she didn't enjoy it, it's that she wanted to, she wanted balance, right? She wanted to do less of it. And I think once she realizes that that at the current pace that she's going, she's never gonna get that balance. Um, you know, that's that's kind of where she realizes that like she has to she kind of has to stand up for herself and set those boundaries. Like I think a lot of us do, right? And I think a lot of us are feeling that right now too, especially um that we just either, either like something's gotta change, right? Something's gotta give.

SPEAKER_01 6:56

Exactly. Once again, so relatable, just of being able to take a step back and having a character like Scarlett show that it's possible. Like you said, I don't know if I could turn down a seven-figure deal, but for her to have that courage, I think really resonated with me. Especially her friendship with Trina. I don't know if you purposely did this, but Trina was like my go-to person. She was my favorite character. I know she was a sidekick, but to me, Scarlet and Trina's friendship was like the highlight, one of the highlights in the in the story. Uh did you feel that? Did you want that as well? Like, why was it important to you to highlight women's friendship in this book?

SPEAKER_00 7:41

I um my favorite characters to write are the same characters. They're just so fun, right? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 7:51

Right. You know? She just got to look fabulous and live her best life.

SPEAKER_00 7:56

Yeah. Uh, although she is the main character in the next book.

SPEAKER_01 8:00

Oh, spoiler. Thank you. That's all I need to know. It's not a spoiler.

SPEAKER_00 8:04

Yeah, it's not a spoiler. It's definitely it's coming out in August. So it's uh soon. So um, so that was fun too. Like it's always fun taking a side character and making them a main character. But um I w women's friendships, female friendships are almost as important to me as the romance. Yes, right. Um I think probably in real life, my female friendships are I dare I say equally important to my husband. Yeah. Um because without them, I don't know that my relationship with my husband exists, right? Like if I don't have their support or their sounding like a sounding board or a shoulder or just someone to vent to, um who sees it in a different way, right? Like my husband is like he's a guy. Like I don't know how else to explain that. He's a guy, he's wonderful, he's a wonderful guy. Right. He's the best kind of guy, but he's still a guy. And so to have those women in my life who are like like supportive but in a different way. Do you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01 9:16

Yeah, totally.

SPEAKER_00 9:17

Um and I think Trina is that for Scarlett, both in a professional and a personal capacity, which I really liked about their relationship, that she is not only her friend, but she's her agent. And so she has this privilege, I think, of being able to see Scarlett through some of those really tough times, but also to call it like it is, and sometimes be like, hey, you're kind of being silly about this, like get it, get it together, you know? Right, right. Um and also, like, yeah, this is still like she cares about Scarlett, but this is still a business, and she and Scarlett wants to sell this book, and so Trina's like, Well then get it together. You gotta sell the book, yeah. Yeah. Um, and so I think that that's I think Trina, I like to think Trina does a good job of like towing that line of of being like really super supportive of Scarlett in her, you know, depressive episodes and her burnout and trying to get her to a point where her career becomes sustainable, but in a friendship way, but also in in like a way where Trina's very focused on Scarlett's career. Like it is Scarlett's career, is Trina's career. Like they are intertwined. Um but I think being able to have someone in Scarlett's corner, especially for this book, right? Like Scarlett was so depressed, right, and burned out, and that she she needed someone more than just Ryan to love her for who she was and show her that she deserved to be loved in a lot of different ways, right? Like with that, with Trina and with Ryan. Um because those types of love are different.

SPEAKER_01 11:04

Yeah, but we need both. You need both of them for sure.

SPEAKER_00 11:07

Yeah, yeah. And so Scarlett got to have that, and I think that was really important for her healing, right? Because it was her like her friendship, her career, and her love life. Like all of those things needed to kind of heal for her.

SPEAKER_01 11:20

Well, speaking about her her career, it seems like her writing was just as important to her as her friendships and her relationship with Ryan. Did you always envision creativity and love being so intertwined in the story?

SPEAKER_00 11:35

In this story, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 11:37

I thought it I thought it was great.

SPEAKER_00 11:39

Thank you. Yeah, because Ryan, like tr like we just like I just said, like Trina is very focused on Scarlett's career, obviously, because if Scarlett gets paid, Trina gets paid, and like we like to get paid.

SPEAKER_01 11:52

Right.

SPEAKER_00 11:53

Um for Ryan, you know, he fell in love with Scarlett, but he also fell in love with Scarlett's work.

SPEAKER_01 12:03

Right. Very true. Right.

SPEAKER_00 12:04

And so at first, and I think that's that was what was so appealing about this story to me as I was writing it, was that like Ryan loves Scarlett. Like it doesn't, it doesn't matter if she wrote another word for the rest of her life. Like he would still love her, right? But like part of Scarlett, like so much of Scarlett is her writing, her words. And Ryan falls in so so deeply in love with her words that like I think even if she was like, No, we can't be anything ever, he would be like, Well, this book needs to be in existence. Like, we have to we have to work on this book, you know. Like, he he loved her work so much that um, and not just because it was a part of her, because he because it resonated with him.

SPEAKER_01 12:51

Right. Was it fun writing Brian's perspective? Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:56

Oh yeah. I mean, he's so he's so gone from the start. I was like, like as I'm writing his perspective, like like a lot of times you want to write like a grumpy guy or a guy that like resists or whatever, but Ryan was so perfect because at every time I was like, could we make him sappier? Yes, we could. And I did. And it was it was great, you know. It was just like I needed it. I needed Ryan to be just a sad down path, you know.

SPEAKER_01 13:26

He had it. The bodies and souls and words entwined in a love deeper than any I've experienced before or since. That was probably like one of the most like resonated things, and I was like, oh my gosh. Once again, just living it up for these book characters and not for the real men that are out here in these streets. I loved it. Was it sometimes kind of emotional for you to write some of these parts?

SPEAKER_00 14:00

Oh my god, yeah. I don't think towards like like the second half of the book on. I don't think there was a time I opened up the document and didn't cry.

SPEAKER_01 14:07

Oh my gosh, I could so can believe it. Because I was just like, oh, oh, take me back. These nice, it's nice to have that refreshing perspective, that refreshing guy in it. Like, oh my gosh. One of the biggest takeaways for me was Scarlett walking away from something that no longer served her, even though it looked successful from the outside. What do you hope readers take away from that or learn from Scarlett?

SPEAKER_00 14:35

Yeah, I think exactly that, right? Like, like I, you know, I can't tell you how this book was really personal for me to write. Like I dedicate, I mean, I dedicated it to myself. Like it's a reminder to me that I'm strong enough, that I've been through a lot, that I've survived the hardest days that I've had so far, and I'm just gonna keep doing that, right? Right. Um, and that's what I want it to be for other people too, that like like this this acknowledgement that that yeah, that you've survived the hardest days that it have been thrown at you, and so you so you can, you know. Um But I think too that like I can't even tell you how many times people have have been like, oh, you're you know, you're okay, you're so strong, right? Like you're like like good for you, you're so strong, like you're gonna make it, you're gonna be great. Everything is everything's coming up roses for Allie, right? And it's like that's not how it is. You know, almost ever. Um for whatever reason, right? Like personal things, but also like like God, as a writer, like your self-doubt, like your your the negative self-talk, right? Like every time you sit down and you're like, ah, nobody's gonna like this, like is anybody gonna like this? Um this idea that like like putting your like your kind of like your soul on the on the page for consumption, right? For entertainment. Um and Scarlet does that, right? And that and people, of course, like you know, I've had people message me and be like, well, I really loved this, but you know, I want to be a writer and like Scarlet, that's not realistic. And I'm like, well, maybe it's not, right? Like maybe it's not. Romance is not realistic a lot of the time. It's like we're reading this to like escape. And I think that's sort of the point, right? That like who would walk away from like we just said it, who would walk away from a seven-figure book seal? Like, well, maybe me if if it meant I couldn't be with my family, and so I think like that this this outward picture of success is not always what's happening behind closed doors, right? Like Instagram or whatever is a highlight reel. Like, we know this, right? You know it, right? But it's a different thing to see it play out, and I think we've seen a lot of writers recently, like like big writers, Rebecca Yarros, Sarah J. Moss, like come out and say that drafting some of these books with these tight deadlines and you know you know, and having like reader opinions and stuff, like pummeling them, like that's been some of the hardest times of their lives. And I think that that's maybe it is realistic. I don't have a seven-figure book deal, so I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 17:26

I mean, that's fair. But I think I think what you've you talked about, like publishing revisions, like all of that. I think you really hit you know, hit it on saying that this is what a lot of authors are going through, whether they're trying to break into the industry or they're in it, they've been, you know, riding on this high for so long, but they gotta keep going.

SPEAKER_00 17:48

Yeah, and you have these readers that are like, when is the next one coming? What's you know, right? Or you get like recognized in in the airport or something with your kids, and you're like that part, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 18:00

I can only imagine. Y'all are a lot nicer than I would be if I was an author for sure. Or recognizable.

SPEAKER_00 18:09

People would love to get recognized in the airport too, you know, but oh yeah, of course. Like I get it, right? Like, there are people who they start to like not see you as a real human person, you know, and and they think that you're because you are creating these stories for entertainment and for consumption, that like they can they can demand certain things because they're paying for it, right? Right, and that's just like not how it works.

SPEAKER_01 18:37

No, but I think there needs to be, I mean, I think some you know, hardcore readers who've been reading since you know they popped out that we understand, like we know it takes time and stuff, but I do think you know, social media unfortunately has unrealistically kind of put these demands on a lot of authors in the industry and stuff like that. So I do think it's some of us are appreciative, some are just very demanding, but I I think that there's more people that are appreciative and kind and genuine out there, right?

SPEAKER_00 19:11

But like it's the people who aren't that are the loudest sometimes, I think. And like, yeah, when that entitlement starts coming out, right? Like people start feeling like entitled to a certain type of story or a certain timeline or or whatever, and and I think when you have that pressure, and of course, like as because you know, authors are entertainers, we are like it is entertainment, and we want to make our readers happy, and we want to make our publishers happy, and we want to make you know the media happy and like whatever else, but we also have to make ourselves happy, and I think that was Scarlett's choice, right? She was like, Well, I can be happy, or everybody else can be happy, but she was so young, right? She was in her 20s at the time that she walked away, and like I can I can imagine being in my 20s and being like, like, I don't see a way for everybody to be happy, so I'm gonna just not do it at all.

SPEAKER_01 20:11

Right. No, that's true. That's true. Well, we I appreciate just the journey and everything with this this book. So before we go, I do want to kind of do like a fun little lightning round. Okay, real quick. So, favorite scene to write in this book?

SPEAKER_00 20:29

In this book, uh, Ryan's Tattoo.

SPEAKER_01 20:32

Oh, okay. I like that.

SPEAKER_00 20:34

That was my favorite. That was my favorite one. It was so it was, I want to say it was fun because it's kind of sad, but it's that one.

SPEAKER_01 20:42

I like that. Not expecting that one. Um, hardest scene to write.

SPEAKER_00 20:50

I think the scene where we kind of find out what, like, I don't want to spoil anything, but like why Scarlett like the ultimate reason why she walked away.

SPEAKER_01 20:59

Yes. That was hard to read, but I appreciated it for sure. Uh, Scarlett or Ryan's P.O.V.

SPEAKER_00 21:09

Like favorite?

SPEAKER_01 21:10

Yeah.

unknown 21:11

Oh, God.

SPEAKER_00 21:15

You know what? I I should say Ryan because he was fun, but I'm gonna say Scarlett. She is so like self-aware and like self-deprecating. Like her humor. Yeah, her dark humor. I was just really, I really that was relatable for me. I mean, Scarlett is is me.

SPEAKER_01 21:35

Right. I love that so much. All right, your current favorite read right now.

unknown 21:40

Um, oh my god. Really, really?

SPEAKER_01 21:45

Or what are you reading right now? What am I reading right now?

SPEAKER_00 21:48

Um I'm reading Toe to Toe by Fallon Ballard.

SPEAKER_01 21:51

Okay. Love that.

unknown 21:52

It's good. It's really good. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 21:53

I'm gonna have that's gonna be on my long list uh TBR list for sure. Um, writing snack and drink. Of choice. Um, I love popcorn. I'm a salty girl. Okay, okay. And sparkling water. Oh, see, love that with all my heart. And then what song belongs on this book's soundtrack?

SPEAKER_00 22:14

Oh my, I have a whole playlist on my website.

SPEAKER_01 22:17

Um, I did I did see that, I did, and I was like, I'm gonna have to listen to I should have listened to it while I was reading it, but I saw it afterwards. So I might have to do it with Trina's book coming up.

SPEAKER_00 22:27

There all the playlists are on the are on there right now, but they're really like they're like vibey. Like that's just what I listened to while I was writing it. So um, but I think this is kind of a throwback, a little bit of a throwback, but madness by Muse.

SPEAKER_01 22:46

Ooh, okay.

SPEAKER_00 22:47

I know it's kind of weird, but I really feel like there was a lot of their relationship that was um kind of madness. Like that they just were they were just like crazy for each other, you know. I feel like that song speaks to that play.

SPEAKER_01 23:02

No, I love that. Okay, that's perfect. Well, thank you again so much for joining me today. This was amazing, and I love just getting another deep dive into this story, into this love madness of Scarlet and Ryan. I cannot wait to read Trina's POV. Like that, oh, she was my favorite, so I'm so excited for that. Allie, thank you again so much for joining me. Not a strong enough word is such a thoughtful exploration of burnout, creativity, friendship, and love. And I'm so excited for more readers to discover it with the paperback release this month. You can find more from Ally online, and I'll also have my full review and additional thoughts linked on my sub stack. Thanks everyone for listening, and I'll see you next time on Lit with Laura Ashley.